Cooking Mama Hates On Science Papa
It’s not unusual for game developers to stage pissing contests with one another, usually through drawling letters or blog posts that entertain no-one. We’re talking about a pastime that’s crawling with monsters and aliens and soldiers armed to the teeth. Why can’t more developers settle their differences through all-out Pokemon wars?
At least one company seems capable of remembering it’s all for fun: Majesco. When word got out yesterday about Activision’s slightly-derivative Science Papa mini-game collection for the Wii and DS, Kotaku wrote to Majesco and asked for the company’s opinion on the dubious tribute. Majesco responded through fire-eyed Mama, who shook a wooden spoon in Science Papa’s general direction. It seems the good doctor is in fact a cad.
How does Mama know this? They used to date, apparently. And, uh, “experiment” together.
“So you want some dirt on ‘Science Papa’ to splash on your site? I’ll shovel it. We dated briefly (when he had much better hair). And now he clearly wants a piece of the best-selling pie by associating himself with an incredibly successful, and I’ll emphasize, happily married, woman. Frankly, he never appreciated my cooking and I grew weary of his tedious “experiments.” You want real mind-bending science, go figure out how to make Toulouse Cassoulet for your next dinner party of 20 and let me know how it goes, Papa.”
Erectile dysfunction joke in 3…2…
This isn’t the first time Cooking Mama has emerged from Imagination Land to defend her honour. When PETA attacked Mama’s turkey-killing ways last Thanksgiving, Mama assured the Internet that she loves animals, but if the decision comes down to sparing the beasties and feeding her family, so long Bambi.
Interestingly, Mama’s response to PETA’s accusations of murder and mayhem was friendly and rational, but she’s just plain pissed off at Science Papa.
Related Links:
Now You’re a Killer, Just Like Mama
Overpowering the Flavor: Cooking Mama and Cutscene Clutter
The Blatant Sexism of Cooking Mama and Science Papa
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Tags: activision, cooking mama, Majesco, nadia oxford, science papa




John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.
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I’m still waiting on that Cooking Mama/Science Papa slashfic. It’s been over a day and nobody has written one yet.