The Modern Materialist: New and Improved

In lieu of our usual Week in Review post…

I’m excited to announce that, as of next week, The Modern Materialist will be reborn as Tools of Attraction.

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So Long, And Thanks for All The Fish

I was having a conversation the other day about how pervasive Douglas Adams’ The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy has been in culture. Foremost, I think, is that most people know the answer to the question “What is the meaning of life?” is “42.”

The other is the immortal message uttered by the dolphins as they leave Earth in the first book in the series, right before the planet is destroyed: Continue reading »

Wear Your Seed On Your Sleeves

Being a manly man doesn’t mean you can’t be fashionable–in fact, what better way to show off what a man you are than to wear the product of your manly seed on your sleeve?

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The Lost Art of Being Polite

Though Mystery advises men to “neg” girls to build attraction (ie. make fun of them a little bit), I still think that being polite goes a long way–ain’t nothing wrong with being a gentleman!

And on those rainy days when everyone’s umbrellas are bumping in the air as people hustle bustle down the sidewalks, show the world how polite you are by clearing the air space with the Polite Umbrella.

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Candy Ass!

Why am I not surprised you can find a picture of an actual candy ass on the internet? In any case, if you’re a fan of being cheeky (pun intended), and cross stitch, you’ll love these kits: Continue reading »

Shirt Of The Day: Tell Off Your Boss [NSFWish]

Tired of your boss telling you what to do all the time? No worries, friend, we’ve got a shirt for you to wear to work that will say what you never had the courage to say: Continue reading »

Tools of Seduction: Take a Chance

We’ve already introduced you to Connect Foreplay, but I think we’re all in agreement that there are classier ways to seduce your mate. Like, for example, this dice and lingerie set that makes foreplay a delicious game of chance:

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Tailored Suits at Thin Prices

[$443, Thick As Thieves]

We all know that a well-fitted suit is a tool of attraction, but an ill-fitted suit could mean your demise as you drown in a a sea of excess fabric, held down by wide lapels, boxy shoulders, and long sleeves.

Of course, a custom-tailored suit would cost a good amount of moola. Thankfully, Thick As Thieves suits don’t cost much more than a suit you’d pick up at the mall:

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Winners: SketchFest NYC Tickets

If you’re in the New York City area, and are a fan of sketch comedy, you’re going to want to check out SketchFest NYC, June 11-13, which presents three days of the best sketch comedy in the world.

The Fest features people like Kids in the Hall’s Kevin McDonald, and Flight of the Choncords’ Kristen Schaal, and many more, and we have your chance to see the whole weekend, free.

And speaking of which, the two winners of a pair of passes each to the Fest are… Continue reading »

You Lookin’ at Me?

[$127, Made in Design]

Uh huh, you’re a fly dude. You’ve got your aviators on, you’re sporting your favorite jeans, and you’ve totally perfected your strut. It’s a perfect package of heartthrob. But what happens when you’re indoors? Invest in these aviator mirrors, and you’ll be hip indoors and out:

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