The Modern Materialist: New and Improved

In lieu of our usual Week in Review post…
I’m excited to announce that, as of next week, The Modern Materialist will be reborn as Tools of Attraction.
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Tags: modern materialist, nerve, products, shopping, tools of attraction
So Long, And Thanks for All The Fish

I was having a conversation the other day about how pervasive Douglas Adams’ The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy has been in culture. Foremost, I think, is that most people know the answer to the question “What is the meaning of life?” is “42.”
The other is the immortal message uttered by the dolphins as they leave Earth in the first book in the series, right before the planet is destroyed: Continue reading »
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Tags: books, dolphins, douglas adams, fish, goodbye, hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy
Wear Your Seed On Your Sleeves

Being a manly man doesn’t mean you can’t be fashionable–in fact, what better way to show off what a man you are than to wear the product of your manly seed on your sleeve?
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Tags: accessories, cufflinks, fashion
The Lost Art of Being Polite

Though Mystery advises men to “neg” girls to build attraction (ie. make fun of them a little bit), I still think that being polite goes a long way–ain’t nothing wrong with being a gentleman!
And on those rainy days when everyone’s umbrellas are bumping in the air as people hustle bustle down the sidewalks, show the world how polite you are by clearing the air space with the Polite Umbrella.

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Tags: umbrella
Candy Ass!

Why am I not surprised you can find a picture of an actual candy ass on the internet? In any case, if you’re a fan of being cheeky (pun intended), and cross stitch, you’ll love these kits: Continue reading »
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Tags: ass, candy, cross stitch
Shirt Of The Day: Tell Off Your Boss [NSFWish]
![how-to-get-your-boss-off-your-back how to get your boss off your back Shirt Of The Day: Tell Off Your Boss [NSFWish]](http://blogs.nerve.com/modernmaterialist/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/how-to-get-your-boss-off-your-back.jpg)
Tired of your boss telling you what to do all the time? No worries, friend, we’ve got a shirt for you to wear to work that will say what you never had the courage to say: Continue reading »
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Tags: bosses, Shirt of the Day, shirts
Tools of Seduction: Take a Chance

We’ve already introduced you to Connect Foreplay, but I think we’re all in agreement that there are classier ways to seduce your mate. Like, for example, this dice and lingerie set that makes foreplay a delicious game of chance:
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Tags: dice, lingerie, sexy
Tailored Suits at Thin Prices

[$443, Thick As Thieves]
We all know that a well-fitted suit is a tool of attraction, but an ill-fitted suit could mean your demise as you drown in a a sea of excess fabric, held down by wide lapels, boxy shoulders, and long sleeves.
Of course, a custom-tailored suit would cost a good amount of moola. Thankfully, Thick As Thieves suits don’t cost much more than a suit you’d pick up at the mall:
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Tags: fashion, mens, suit
Winners: SketchFest NYC Tickets

If you’re in the New York City area, and are a fan of sketch comedy, you’re going to want to check out SketchFest NYC, June 11-13, which presents three days of the best sketch comedy in the world.
The Fest features people like Kids in the Hall’s Kevin McDonald, and Flight of the Choncords’ Kristen Schaal, and many more, and we have your chance to see the whole weekend, free.
And speaking of which, the two winners of a pair of passes each to the Fest are… Continue reading »
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Tags: Contests, sketch comedy, sketchfest, sketchfest nyc, winners
You Lookin’ at Me?

[$127, Made in Design]
Uh huh, you’re a fly dude. You’ve got your aviators on, you’re sporting your favorite jeans, and you’ve totally perfected your strut. It’s a perfect package of heartthrob. But what happens when you’re indoors? Invest in these aviator mirrors, and you’ll be hip indoors and out:
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Tags: aviators, home decor, mirrors




Steph Auteri is a freelance writer and proofreader who has been published in Publishers Weekly, New York Press, Playgirl, and other bastions of fine writing. She maintains a professional site
Alex Zalben is a writer living in New York City. He's written for McSweeney's, Modern Humorist and PulpSecret.com. As one-fifth of the sketch comedy group Elephant Larry, he has been written up in the New York Times, Chicago Tribune, and pretty much every other major publication. Their blog was named one of PC Magazine's Top Blogs for 2007, and they recently won an ECNY Award for their viral short, "Minesweeper: The Movie." Alex did not know love until he bought his first Mac.
Diana Vilibert is a freelance writer, among other things. Born in Lithuania, she now lives in New Jersey, where she doesn't have to walk to work ten miles in the snow, barefoot, uphill both ways. Diana cannot afford most of the products she writes about because she buys too many pairs of heels to make up for her shoeless childhood. She's written for MarieClaire.com, Janemag.com, and CosmoGIRL!.
Shaun Seneviratne is a dude just like anyone else. Just your average guy that raps Bone Thugs-n-Harmony to strangers on the subway at 4 a.m., doesn't chew his food because he believes it's a waste of time, and sleeps next to a scale replica of the Ghostbusters headquarters. He can rest easy knowing Egon, Peter, Ray, and Winston have his back. He currently lives in northern New Jersey, plays bass in
Laureen Mahler is a writer and editor who lives in California, where the sun never sets and everyone rollerskates to work. She coedits 

